i tucked my feelings away without realizing it and they peeked out today while listening to a CD in the car. i don't like it when they sneek up on me like that. i like to be prepared. the girls didn't notice, but i could hardly see the road as my eyes welled up with tears.
last week, we went camping at el capitan. a beautiful beachside campground on the bluffs. i was sitting down on the sand, watching the kids play, especially ian. he's an artist like his daddy, you know. i looked out to the water and began to think of brian. i heard his laugh. sounds crazy, i know. but i audibly heard his laugh. signature. beautiful. that one snuck up on me too.
will i ever stop missing him?
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